This time last year I was
for the Belladrum Festival
The greatest show on earth
and that is absolutely unquestionable

The Suns of Arqa was my well-paid gig
A shared toilet
make-up and 50 quid
The Venus Flytrap was the venue of choice
I’d warmed-up in the bog to stretch my voice

I ran on stage and slipped on someone’s spew
My kilt rode-up alas – what a view!
I struggled to my feet – you gotta break a leg
I heard a manashee from Dingwall scream,
“that gadgie’s got no kegs”

I grabbed the mic and gave it laldie
i.e. yahoo-dixie
trying to out-sing the mainstage’s headlining dinn
I nearly passed-out competing for the audience
against a lassie from London – Jessie Glynne

Covid 19’s knackered Bella 2020
This summer’s looking gruamach
awfully bleak
but I’m still hoping I might get the call
from Nile Rodgers & his Le Chic

Even though we can’t be somewhere
doesn’t mean our hearts stay away
We can imagine anywhere we want
and that’s what stops us going insane

So if you want to be with Bella
imagine you have taken Bella
into your heart
Make-believe is the stardust of creatives
Dream of life as your work of art

Dream what you want where you want
when you want with who you want
dream so that you don’t take life too seriously
Dream especially in the midst of
this lockdown bluesy misery

Dream that we can love for ever
Close your eyes for the feeling
that’ll surely come
Imagine yourself singing and dancing
in the sun at Belladrum